#95. Rethinking Goal Setting
Aligning Ambition with Purpose
Welcome to the blog post #95 and the first one of 2025! Click here to read more from previous posts.
Every January, most of us begin the year with a list of ambitious goals, some of which might be carried over from the previous year. We tell ourselves that this year will be different—that we’ll finally achieve what we set out to do.
Yet, the initial surge of motivation often fades quickly, and our goals gradually slip into oblivion. I’ve also found myself in this situation, requiring me for self-reflection.
At work, we have checkpoints to track progress of our KPIs, and there are tangible consequences if we miss them. These structures help drive accountability and keep us on track.
But in our personal lives, where we are our own boss, staying disciplined becomes much harder. Rewards don’t come immediately, and the consequences of inaction are less visible in the short term. As a result, long-term goals can easily fall through the cracks.
At times like these, I’m reminded of Michelangelo’s powerful words:
The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.
This quote serves as a wake-up call, reminding me of the importance of setting challenging but meaningful goals.
Reflecting on my approach to goal-setting, two ideas come to my mind: the infinite mindset from Simon Sinek’s The Infinite Game and Stephen Covey’s framework of human fulfillment in First Things First. Together, these philosophies offer a fresh way to rethink and reshape how we set and pursue our goals.
The Infinite Mindset
Simon Sinek’s infinite game concept emphasizes that life isn’t about "winning" but about staying in the game and continuously striving for improvement. Finite games, like sports, have clear rules and endpoints. Infinite games, like life, have no definitive end. The goal is not to "win" but to grow, adapt, and persist.
When applied to goal-setting, this mindset shifts the focus:
From Outcomes to Purpose: Goals should align with a larger purpose rather than be standalone achievements. Think of outcomes as checkpoints that guide us toward your purpose, not as the ultimate destination.
Progress Over Perfection: An infinite mindset reduces the pressure to compare ourselves to others. Instead of striving for perfection, prioritize consistent progress in our journey.
Resilience Over Short-Term Wins: Success in an infinite game requires adaptability and perseverance. Short-term wins are motivating, but resilience ensures we can navigate setbacks and continue forward.
Commit to the Journey, Not the Destination: Define who we want to become, not just what we want to achieve. This perspective helps us value the process and recognize that growth happens along the way.
Covey’s Framework of Human Needs for Fulfillment
Stephen Covey’s First Things First outlines four fundamental human needs:
To Live: Our physical needs for health, financial well-being, and time management.
To Love: Our social need for connection, belonging, and relationships.
To Learn: Our mental need for growth, knowledge, and self-improvement.
To Leave a Legacy: Our spiritual need for purpose, contribution, and meaning.
This framework provides a holistic view of what constitutes a fulfilling life. By integrating these needs into our goals, we can balance immediate priorities with long-term aspirations.
Integrating the Infinite Mindset and Covey’s Framework
Combining these two philosophies offers us a powerful approach to goal-setting:
Start with our purpose. Let our "why" guide our "what" and "how."
Use Covey’s four needs to create a balanced foundation for our goals.
Apply the infinite mindset to focus on growth, adaptability, and resilience.
To put this into practice, I’ve developed a personal framework based on six life components:
Live: Physicality, Finance, Time
Love: Relationships
Learn: Mentality
Leave a Legacy: Spirituality
For each component, I set goals guided by these reflective questions.
Reflective Questions for Goal-Setting
1. Live: Physicality, Finance, Time
This pillar focuses on your overall well-being, financial security, and effective use of time.
Physicality
What daily habits will improve my physical health and energy levels?
Are there any unhealthy habits I need to eliminate or reduce this year?
How can I make physical activity a sustainable part of my routine?
What is one physical challenge (e.g., a race, weight goal, or flexibility goal) I can set for myself this year?
Finance
Am I satisfied with my current financial situation? If not, what needs to change?
What long-term financial goals do I want to achieve (e.g., savings, investments, retirement)?
How can I improve my spending habits to align with my priorities?
What new income-generating opportunities can I explore?
How can I ensure my financial choices align with my values and purpose?
Time
How am I currently spending my time, and does it align with my priorities in my professional and personal life?
What activities should I reduce or eliminate to make space for what truly matters?
How can I better structure my time to focus on long-term goals?
2. Love: Relationships
This pillar centers on nurturing meaningful connections.
Which action can I do daily to show my care for my family?
Are there any relationships I’ve neglected and want to strengthen this year?
How can I improve my communication skills to deepen connections with others?
What boundaries do I need to set to maintain healthy relationships?
How can I handle conflicts more constructively and empathetically?
3. Learn: Mentality
This pillar focuses on intellectual and personal growth.
What skills or knowledge will help me grow personally or professionally?
What books, courses, or experiences can broaden my perspective?
How can I push myself outside my comfort zone to build resilience?
What challenges have I faced recently, and what lessons can I take from them?
What habits or routines can I develop to sharpen my mind (e.g., journaling, meditation, or critical thinking exercises)?
How can I use failures as learning opportunities instead of setbacks?
4. Leave a Legacy: Spirituality
This pillar emphasizes living a purpose-driven life and contributing to something larger than myself.
What is my life’s purpose, and how can I align my actions with it?
What kind of impact do I want to leave on my family, community, or profession?
What does success truly mean to me, beyond material achievements?
Who or what inspires me spiritually, and how can I incorporate that inspiration into my life?
How can I ensure my actions today align with the legacy I want to leave behind?
Bringing It All Together
Goal-setting is more than writing down tasks and ticking boxes. It’s about aligning your actions with your purpose, balancing short-term wins with long-term aspirations, and focusing on the journey rather than the destination. By combining the infinite mindset with Covey’s framework, we can create goals that are meaningful, adaptable, and fulfilling.
As you set your goals this year, reflect on these insights. What is your purpose? How do your goals serve your physical, social, mental, and spiritual needs?
Remember, life isn’t about winning—it’s about growing, contributing, and staying in the game.
Till next week!
Cheers,
Do Thi Dieu Thuong